Mentors, Supporters, and Guardians

Do you have a Mentor*? Supporter*? Guardian*?

I want to know what these words mean to you.

I recently had an inquiry from a potential new client who wanted to know if I had a “quick” solution for his dog’s behavior problem. It was clear to me, from previous communications, that there was no easy solution because there were multiple parts to changing the dog’s behavior. The subject of an e-collar surfaced, since previous dogs that the family owned were trained with one. I do not use e-collars, nor advocate for their use, yet I continued to have a positive, thoughtful conversation with him, describing what I could do to help. Ultimately it is his choice which direction he wants to proceed with his dog’s training. Our methods may not be the same, but we were able to have a discussion without contempt or raised voices. I believe I was able to educate him, even if only a little, on why I do not feel e collars are best practice when working to change a dog’s behavior.  

I consider myself a guardian of dogs. I use humane, science-based training methods to try to protect as many dogs as I can from harmful treatment in the name of “training.” I consider myself a supporter of the LIMA Principle, as defined by the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants. Least intrusive, minimally aversive strategies should be used with every dog, regardless of age, breed, or initial behavior. I also consider myself a mentor, as several of my students have gone on to become instructors themselves, in a variety of disciplines. My students routinely reach their goals, enjoying success in both competitive situations and with better behavior at home.

In my opinion, mentors are teachers, who allow you access to their knowledge, yet encourage you to create your own pathway and make your own decisions. A mentor should also be a supporter, even if the mentee’s decisions may not be the same as theirs. To be a guardian, one must be willing to take criticism from others, and have a strong desire to protect what they believe in.

I started thinking about these three definitions. How our world seems to have a lack of mentors, mentees, and supporters. I suppose this could be just me looking at the world through clouded lenses. Guardians are even more rare, in my opinion. So many of us do not want to face the scrutiny or malcontent of others. We have a definite lack in ability, as a society, for listening to and accepting the opinions of others if they differ from our own.

I belong to a variety of different organizations, both dog and non-dog related. The more I think about how these three words apply, the more I see why so many are struggling. As mentors, we must be willing to help educate new individuals that show interest. New members are the lifeblood of an organization! How does an organization survive if we do not attract new members? As supporters, we must embrace those who share our passions, even if their direction may be different from ours. An organization cannot survive if all its members disappear. And as guardians, we must make sure we are strong enough to come together to protect what we collectively believe in.

We can disagree without being disagreeable. We can, and should, celebrate the success of others. We can learn from those who set the path before us. We must all, ultimately, choose what is right for us as individuals. But let us not forget that without our mentors and supporters, we could not be guardians.

*Special thanks to all who answered my Facebook questions regarding the definitions of these words. You validated my thinking!